What Amazon Says
Loving our children’s children well is an art–one we keep learning as they grow.
Making memories and fostering relationships with our grandchildren in the midst of a fast-moving culture isn’t easy, and a legacy that lasts isn’t crafted overnight. So how do we as grandparents cultivate strong, meaningful relationships with the children we adore?
Start with The Mindful Grandparent. With twelve grandchildren between them, authors and educators Marilyn McEntyre and Shirley Showalter know deep in their bones that attending to the small ones in our lives has never been more important. Grandparents can help little ones learn to value relationships over things, lap time over screen time. They can help grandchildren live with intention, attentive to others, to nature, and to the diverse, beautiful, and troubled social world around them.
The Mindful Grandparent doesn’t shy away from the challenging issues in contemporary grand-parenting. Through inspired ideas teamed with simple practices and engaging stories, The Mindful Grandparent covers wide-ranging topics such as cultivating curiosity, giving meaningful gifts, helping children explore difficult topics, building a grandparent team, honoring adult children’s boundaries, and managing technology.
Let The Mindful Grandparent be your guide and source of refuge for the sacred and sometimes bewildering work of grand-parenting.
Shirley Showalter
Marilyn McEntyre
My Amazon Review
The Mindful Grand-parent by Marilyn McEntyre and Shirley Showalter offers kindly guidance for grandparents of all ages and stages. It’s a handbook of practical instruction, a roadmap for discovering the joys of grand-parenting, and a treasure trove of personal stories with resources, both print and digital.
Authors McEntire and Showalter, both educators, knit themes together with stories gleaned from experience. The authors never lose sight of their audience, offering down-to-earth suggestions for grandparents. Some is contained in lists, which I found helpful:
Ch. 15 “Stuff Better than Toys”
Ch. 25 “What Good Grandparents Do”
Ch. 43 “A Few Truths to Talk About”
Useful tips for specific needs are also included:
- Grand-parenting from afar? Light a candle as a way to send out love energy to distant grandchildren.
- What about emotion? Authors address fear and cite books and songs that inspire courage.
- How to become a good ancestor? See Chapter 49
As a grandparent of four teens, this book invited me to reminisce and pause to consider my legacy. Bite-size chapters make for stress-free reading. At 257 pages, the book is a must-read for those on the threshold of grand-parenting or long-time elders. This well-researched volume can be a great Mother’s Day or birthday gift for grandparents at both ends of the spectrum.
Collaboration at a Distance
Shirley reports that she met Marilyn four years ago when they both served on a panel during a writers’ festival. Now she anticipates their first face to face meeting. As she mentioned in an email message to me in late April, “Soon we get to greet each other, do a podcast together, and speak to the people.”
Without digital means, this book maybe would have not been published. Or, it may have taken much longer with the limitations of the postal service.
My four grandchildren, now teenagers, eat cupcakes, celebrating a milestone several years ago when they were all in grade school
Two of the cupcakes did a disappearing act before the photo shoot
Amazon Link, The Mindful Grandparent: Find it HERE
Happy reading!
How do you relate to this book? Maybe you influence the younger generation in other ways, perhaps as a teacher, an aunt, uncle or mentor, or in a blended family.
Do you have experience with collaboration? Tell us about it!
Good morning, Marian! A lovely write up of Shirley’s book.
I don’t have grandchildren, but I did collaborate on writing a book with a Swedish professor originally from Turkey. I think she and her family actually moved to Sweden while we were working on the book. We were matched up by our editor, and we ended-up working well together. We’ve never met.
Good morning to YOU, early bird! You do well solo, especially with your poetry book, but I notice you collaborate often with other poets in contributing to their collections too. I wonder if the collaboration with the Swedish author was with one of your encyclopedias. Thanks for starting us off, once again, Merril! 😀
You’re welcome, Marian! It was a Rape Cultures and Survivors: An International Perspective (ABC-CLIO Press). It’s a 2-volume set of articles, and Tuba and I also each wrote an article.
You are amazing, Merril: Scholarly prose and prize-winning poetry! 😀
😀
I’ve mentioned this book as a mother’s day gift I’d love to have. So we’ll see. 🙂 I’m looking forward to learning about “gifts better than toys.” Kids are so inundated with toys–especially when there are two or more children and everyone (grandmas and grandpas, aunts and uncles, friends) are invited to birthdays and kids are showered. My daughters despair of where to put all the things, but are learning to pass stuff on to other younger families and of course there’s always thrift shops. They used to get mad at me when I quietly passed stuff on without consulting them, but I think they finally understand why I did what I did. The grandkids do enjoy playing with some of the old toys their moms had. 🙂
Maybe your daughters will “collaborate” and gift you this book. One way or another, I have a feeling you will receive this for Mother’s Day.
Yes, toys!. On Mother’s Day 2016, I pictured two special toys from our childhood, both wooden: https://marianbeaman.com/2016/05/04/baby-beads-and-wooden-blocks-happy-mothers-day/
Heirlooms, I’m sure we didn’t take them to the thrift store. I believe the sister with the youngest grandchildren got them, so they will survive the generations. 😀
My mother was very careful to get us simple toys (such as wooden blocks) that wouldn’t dampen our creativity.
Bless her! ((( )))
😀
My grandkids are adults now, but this would have been a handy book to have when they were a bit younger!
I understand, Joan. We did the best we could though. Mine are all teens now, so I can reminisce. Thanks for joining in! 😀
Marian — I’m reading THE MINDFUL GRANDPARENT right now and loving every turn of the page!
Great testimonial, Laurie. I’m sure you can relate and apply. As you know from little grand-daughter, the early years go by in a flash! 😀
This book is sorely needed today. I know a number of grandparents who are helping to raise their grandchildren. What a great Mother’s Day gift this book is1
I have a lot of friends with kids, so I definitely have input in their lives.
Yes, this book addresses the challenges of many who “parent” as grandparents. What a challenge, especially with less energy for the task. Kudos to you for caring about the younger generation: I know you have influence on those special kids. Thanks for letting us know, Linda Marie! 😀
I can relate to the less energy at times…but its good fun and if a book helps someone as grandparenting is different to parenting in many ways..I think so anyway 🙂
You are right, Carol. Grand-parenting is different from parenting in so many ways. In the best of circumstances, grandparents can enjoy the fruits of their labor without the heavy responsibilities of day-to-day tasks. Yet, we never stop being mothers, even if our children are middle-aged, as mine are. 😀
Absolutely, Marian.. although at the moment we are both as my son is working away and we are in charge.. Lol.. of a 17 year old..
Oh, my, I know that age very well in our own family. It comes with joys and challenges.
Most definitely.. 😂
You are such a good friend, Marian, and such a good friend of this book. Thank you for sharing so generously. Last night I spoke at the book launch in Lititz. Granddaughter Lydia, age almost 5, handed out hard candies in honor of my grandfather who always had candy in his pockets for the children. The room was full and the questions were wonderful It’s obvious that grandparent love is a great force for good in the world, and it’s also obvious that we carry concerns for these dear children’s futures. I love hearing the stories and experiences of other grandparents.
Shirley, your launch comes in the right season — just in time for Mother’s Day. As your book points out, grand-motherhood comes in all shapes, sizes, and ages–and even sometimes without a biological connection, as my post last week points out.
I’m glad your Lititz launch has begun well. Here’s to a success at Landis Homes this afternoon, an audience I know well from my own launch there over two years ago. 😀
Hi,
You have some lovely grandchildren. I don‘t have any because I never had children, but I enjoy my siblings‘ grandchildren when I visit the home of my birth.
This is an Excellent review. I don‘t think I will ever read ithe book but it sounds like a good book for soon to be Opas and Omas. Thank you so much for sharing and have a great day.
Shalom aleichem,
Pat
Thank you for checking in here, Pat. I wonder how close your Georgia connection is to me in Jacksonville. I’m glad you visit them when you come to the States. I have a Florida and Canadian friends who use the terms Opa and Oma, which think are German for Grandparents. Always good to see you here! 😀
As a grandmother of 25 amazing grandkids, I NEED this book! Some are already adults and the youngest is 7, and all but two teenagers live in different states. If I could choose a superpower, it would be to clone myself into many copies of me and to share one consciousness so I can visit and be close to our scattered family as often as they (and I) wish. Thanks for sharing this, Marian!
Patty, thank you for pointing out the challenges of long-distance grand-parenting, which the book addresses. Both authors have experience with long-distance grandparenthood and offer some sound suggestions. Some of them you probably use: Facetime and of course texting.
Twenty-five seems like a huge number to me. Count yourself blessed, my friend! 😀
As you know, I love my four grandchildren and two great-grandchildren to bits. I have never lived in the same province as them and now live in another country across the ocean.
My son tells me I spend more time and effort on them then their other sets of grandparents who live in the same city. For me it’s not quantity but quality time with them. I send them books, postcards etc in the mail and when I visit I make sure I spend time with each one individually. It is important to build happy memories with our grandchildren. This book looks amazing. Well done Shirley and Marilyn. I love the picture of your 4 grandchildren, Marian. I know they have grown up since then.
You are as intentional about grand-parenting as you are about authoring books, which doesn’t surprise me. You know the value of intergenerational connection, our legacy. Kudos to you for that and for spending time with each one individually.
You are right about our four growing up. The two oldest are high school seniors. Yesterday, I went with one of them to pick out a corsage for his prom date, rather a problem with Mother’s Day orders conflicting with lots of high school proms. Thanks once again for sharing, Darlene! 😀
I could use a book on the mind-ful step-grandparent. It can be a challenge being a “third-wheel” sometimes.
You are in luck with this book. It is very inclusive in the definition of grand-parenting and offers resources for blended families and others that don’t fit a “perfect” family paradigm. Thanks for reading and commenting here, always appreciated, Linda! 😀
I’m surprised the book is under 300 pages, because as you know, there’s a LOT to be said about grandparenting! And oh my, the difference between being a grandmom of a 3-year-old and a 13-year-old (your cupcake photo sans two cupcakes is adorable). This blook sounds magnificent, and it’s such a fabulous idea. And the collaboration without seeing each other in person – amazing. Yes, I wrote one of my romantic suspense books (Twin Desires) with another author. But we lived in the same town. However, we didn’t write together – we sent chapters to each other on-line. So I can see how it can work without being in each other’s presence.
The book, rich in ideas, is practical, knowing we are busy people and thrive on bite-sized pieces. But there is depth to the book, including many links to online resources.
I did not know your Twin Desires co-author lived in the same town. I think collaborating on a project would be fun. At the very least, it would be less solitary. Thanks, Pam! 😀
It was lots of fun collaborating, but it could be a chore and a challenge if the two writers don’t agree on the plot/character-development/edits, etc. So a writer must be careful of whom she picks to collaborate with.
I couldn’t agree more. My reply to Liesbet tells how Marilyn and Shirley pulled it off.
I’m happy to see books such as this one because I think the challenges of kids growing up are harder than ever. Whether someone is a grandparent living close by or far away, we want to support our kids and grandkids.
Since our son is newly engaged, I hope to be having grandparent experiences down the road. I can’t wait!
My crystal ball says you’ll be a super grand-parent. You’ve got lots of practical experience as teacher and father.
Our children and their spouses, all Floridians, moved to Chicago for graduate school. In the beginning, they “practiced” parenting with kittens and dogs. After ten years, actual grandchildren emerged. We were thrilled. Now these grandkids are graduating from high school. The years just whiz by. You’ll be a grandparent before you know. But first, wedding bells. 😀
Congratulations, Pete!
You have beautiful grandchildren, Marian! I see mischief in their eyes and in their smiles! I featured the Mindful Grandparent book on my post today as well, just the picture and that it’s on my reading list.
These grandchildren are grown up–well, almost! The two oldest boys are graduating in two weeks and then off to college. Our grand-daughter is a studious junior with her first summer job as a camp counselor. And the youngest is trying to get through 8th grade!
When a book is launched, there is a lot of hoopla. I’m sure Shirley and Marilyn (and your readers) will welcome your reflections later on. By the way, I just visited your blog and left a comment. Just so you know, we are using our AC now with temperatures in the 80s this week.
Always good to see you here. Thanks, Elfrieda! 😀
Grandparenting is not to be for my husband and me, so we’ll grandparent our daughter, now that she’s an adult. (If that makes sense!)
Yes, indeed, that makes sense. Your daughter is at a never-before-experienced stage as all children are. Do savor the moments, Liz. 😀
Such a precious and lovely photo of your four grandkids, Marian. Those smiles!! Collaborating as authors from afar seems tricky to me. I’m sure hundreds of emails back and forth and Zoom or Skype calls were required. I can see why this book is a must-read for grandparents!
Thanks for the compliment about our grandkids, Liesbet. They are all teens now, two graduating from high school in two weeks and the others not far behind.
About the collaboration. This book is expository, not a memoir or novel, which made it a bit easier to share the task. One authors explains that they conversed on the phone, wrote emails, and then decided to write alternating chapters. The biggest challenge was when one writer became sick for several months. It delayed the pub date a bit, but now it’s coming out before Mother’s Day, just perfect. I think also co-authors have to have compatible personalities which these writers did. 😀
Hi Marian, I think being a grandparent is great, all the fun and none of the responsibility. This sounds like a lovely read. Your picture with the missing cupcakes is cute.
Oh, there is some responsibility, but mostly fun. This week I helped older grandson pick out a corsage for his prom date. First of all, I had to point out that corsages can be pin-on or wrist ones. Then we discovered that most florists weren’t taking orders this week, which happens to coincide with Mother’s Day, a day of high demand. We finally found one that was willing to make a wrist corsage in all-white. I think he felt he was lucky to find one at all.
As you can tell, the children with the cupcakes are almost grown up now, but they are still precious to care about. Thanks, Robbie!
I like the ideas you’ve mentioned in this book. I know many of my friends are grooving on being grandparents, not the old-fashioned uptight ones I remember, but the more relaxed supportive grandparents of today. I’ll keep this book in mind for when the topic of grandparenting comes up, as it will.
Your comment made me smile: Down with the uptight, girdled grandmothers and up with the more relaxed variety, which this book surely supports. Thanks, Ally!
Wow. You wouldn’t know this, but I received a text less than an hour ago from my best friend who just became a grandparent for the first time to a baby girl named Olivia. Since this topic is so timely for me right now, I really enjoyed reading your post/review about this book. For starters, I love the lighting the candle tip. I’m clicking the Amazon Link as soon as I finish writing haha. And your own grandchildren are precious! Those grins say everything. I bet they are so much fun. Happy Mother’s Day Marian! 🙂
Wow, what an enthusiastic friend you are. I’m sure your new grandma would enjoy this book. Maybe you’ll even want to sneak a read first!
If you look at Robbie’s comment above and my reply you’ll see how we define fun for our older grandchildren today. Thanks for tuning in, Melanie!
He’s my godson, so I guess I am. 😀 I think it’s great that you just work with the age (even the teen years!) and help them when they need it.
That’s the idea, Melanie. 😀
I’m glad for the authors and for grandparents who will learn from this book. I don’t have grandchildren and it seems unlikely in the future. There comes an age, even for a man, and both my sons are near 50. They have loving relationships which feels important and supportive. I want them to be happy and feel loved.
Because the world is so difficult with issues like climate change which seem impossible to solve, there are times I’m grateful not to have to worry about the future of a grandchild–but that’s just me making myself feel OK about missing out on something I’d always hoped would happen. I’m always happy when my friends bring their grandkids to my house in the summer to release Monarchs. I love the wonder on their faces.
Thanks for sharing this important book. I’ll share the news with friends who are grandparents.
Shirley and Marilyn’s book includes grandparents of all types, even the ones I feel most sympathy for: grandparents who must parent their own grandchildren. They have to have nerves of steel and dig deep for energy reserves.
I see you as a grandmother to many, especially the natural ones, nurturing avians and many generations of monarchs. I was sorry to see on Facebook that you lost a grosbeak, which must make yoursad.
On another note: I’m reading Susan Cain’s Bitter-Sweet; How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole. You may have heard of it. It’s scholarly with pages and pages of notes and indices, but with a narrative tone that keeps me turning pages. I’ve thought of you: the author paints a positive view of what some shy away from as negative.
Thank you for your comment, and Happy Mother’s Day, Elaine! 😀
Hi Marian – thanks for sharing this book – looks like a great manual for grandparents. I think the grandparent-grandchild relationship is important, but very different from parent-child. Do you agree?
You are right, Barbara. There is a difference. As a grandmother, I serve as a buffer between parent and child. I think one of our grandsons share with us things he may not tell his parents. Thanks for your wise observation here, Barb! 😀
Sounds a wonderful collaboration, and a fresh look at modern grandparenting. Thanks for sharing this book Marian. 🙂 x
You got it, Debby. It is fresh and new, including tips on using technology for grand-parenting at a distance. 😀
Perfect book as many grandparents aren’t up to speed in our digital world. 🙂
Exactly!
Hello Marian,
I left a comment on this post and the post from the week before but I see that tooth comments went into cyberspace and disappeared. I can‘t remember all that I wrote, but I did say that the book sounds very engaging. However, since I don‘t have grandchildren I don‘t think I will be reading it.
All the best.
Shalom aleichem